Wednesday, July 6, 2011

No, She Is Not a Boy

I recent Facebook status got me thinking about the fact, people seem to have no filters when it comes to babies. Besides the normal stranger advice like " Oh, do you think s/he should be out this soon. I kept my son in the house until he was fifteen" OK not really ( I hope) but I'm sure you guys know what I am talking about.

It seems a lot of people make snap judgements on a child's sex regardless of how they are dressed. I completely understand that some babies it is hard to tell, lack or hair gender neutral colors etc.. But in this case If I feel the need to let the Mother know what a little cutie she has on her hands - I will tell her just that, and take the lead from her when it comes to the sex of the child, not just assume.

One great example is my own daughter, being the only girl of course she was covered in bows and pink. One day while shopping in her ALL pink carseat, with her CHICKS rule shirt on and matching SKIRT, with a BIG blue bow in her hair - A women jetted from one end of the supermarket just to take a peek at her. She then proceeded to tell my what a cute little boy I had...At this point I was probably giving her that blank are you kidding me look. I politely replied with "that is my DAUGHTER, and yes I think she is cute as well".

I got a nasty reply back that if I wanted people to know she was a girl, I shouldn't be putting blue bows in her hair. Well stupid me! I forgot blue hair bows were made strictly for boys, In fact now that I think about she is right, those were probably even my sons old hair bows.

What lady are you joking! I've seen boys in pink, that is OK with me, I've definitely seen girls in blue but I have NEVER once came across a baby boy ( or a grown man) in hair bows..I mean I'm just saying, maybe I am wrong here. I get that she was probably embarrassed but again if you are unsure, color blind, or think boys wear bows - Don't reference a babies gender.

My point is I see a lot of stories with people upset because some stranger said look at that cute little ( insert gender here) - When really the child was a the opposite gender. Like I said most of the time it's hard to tell, so isn't it better to not say anything or use something generic like what a cute baby, How old is the BABY etc etc..

I say if the baby has hair bow or is in a pink carseat you have the right then, and only then, to assume it's a girl. Although the carseat could be tricky because I would certainly be one to put my son in a pink carseat if I had 

What I'm saying is just please think first, save a Mother the time of then having to ask every other person she knows if their child really looks like a boy and or girl. You know we do that! Another quick tip unsolicited advice to strangers about children or pregnancy is also usually not warranted. And come on NEVER tell a Pregnant women in the store she looks like she could go any day! She knows her belly is growing and what you DON'T know is if she is really due tomorrow or not for another 6mths.

Oh, and while I am at it..If you see me in the store with my four children - Do not say to me I hope your done! You will not like me reply, and it gives me great pleasure to tell you no I am not, and to watch your face drop.


Daisy said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

This was funny! Some people just crack me up with what they say.

jessicaclarke said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

Love ur post,I totally agree.Some people just have no social filters.Just the other day I ran in to someone I haven't seen in awhile and after seeing my 3 kids with me she said "wow you're really popping them out fast" I wasn't sure how to respond to that so I just ignored her,but afterwards wish I would have said something.

dailymom said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

Ha! This is so true, it has happened to me so many times with my daughter it doesn't matter if she is dressed head to toe in pink with a dress and hair bow multiple times I've been told what a cute boy I have, one time at the grocery store an older man commented about my cute boy and I thought his wife was going to beat him right there in the store as she corrected him that it was obvious she is a girl with all that pink on. LOL

Penny Layne said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

My daughter did not have any hair when she was born, so I can relate. I could have her in a pink dress with a pink bow (on a headband) and still have people ask me how old my little boy was. I always wonder what parent was dressing their little boys in dresses and bows to warrant this. Sometimes people really should just keep their mouthes shut. Glad I'm not the only one who's dealt with this.

Twingle Mommy said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

My daughters are bald and my son has a full head of hair. One lady said that I should give my boy a girls haircut if I don't want people to think he's a girl. Really? Just because it's a little long, doesn't make it a girl's haircut. So annoying.
I love the I hope you're done question!! My comeback? Of course not, we don't have a basketball team yet. Or if I'm annoyed that you stopped me and I'm clearly busy-Well we weren't but now that a complete stranger in (insert location name here)told me not to, I'll go home and tell him that you are in charge of the size of our family. The blank stare is priceless after that remark. You should try it out sometime.

Samantha said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

SO MANY people think my son is a girl. DUH. And they will walk right up to my adopted, Asian daughter and ask her if she knows she is adopted. ?????? WTF?

bigguysmama said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

A boy with a bow in his hair? Um, ok. I have 4 kids and my brother started saying if I had more I'd be pushing into his numbers. I have no choice but to stop at 4 b/c it's just me now. LOL I wasn't expecting to be done having kids, but then life happens. I'm really struggling with moving into this new time of my life.


Pink Sade said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

Oh my, my! A boy with bows in his hair? Did they use to do that in ye olden days??? Can't imagine a boy with bows in his hair. I wonder if they'll think boys wear floral headbands next. Btw, great post!

Marvelous Mommy said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

Haha I've learned people are stupid!! My sister has 5 kids so she's gets the "Wow, how many kids??" And one of her boys use to get mistaken for a girl all the time bc of his long curly hair.

People always ask me if Haley is a boy or girl but she's always dressed so girly and in a PINK car seat!!

Lori said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

I guess my boy looks very boy"ish" (whatever that is) so I've not dealt with that yet. What I HAVE dealt with in the supermarket though (and other places) is complete strangers marching right up to pat his cheek or his head, or to grab his hand while gushing to me how cute he is. Now don't get me wrong, I swell with pride with all these compliments, but the touching drives me nuts! I don't know them and I certainly don't know where their hands have been...HANDS OFF THE BABY! :)

jayedee said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

we have a LARGE family (his, mine and ours - 12 kids) and we have always gotten rather intrusive questions and comments like "don't you know what causes that?" and "don't watch much television, do you?"
i always stammered and blushed...but my sister, would shoot it right back at them by asking "why would you ask a rude question like that?"
i think we live in an impolite's like folks have never been taught the art of common courtesy. i hope i've done better with my children than their parents have obviously NOT done with them!

Darcy said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

I add bows (blue even lol) so people will know Rissa is a girl when in gender neutral colors.

Her infant carseat is green and brown. Even when wrapped with a pink blanket over her I had people ask "how old is HE?" "He has such big eyes"

She's a girl dammit!

GrammyMouseTails said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

some people just are not aware what idiots they sound like! who knows, maybe there is some culture where she saw boys with bows in their hair & wearing all frilly pinks? LOL, maybe way back in Victorian times or medieval?? which is where this womans brain most likely came from. and as how many kids you may have with you is NO indication how many are yours if any, and no ones business. well said ;)

Callista said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

I totally understand. What's weird is everyone seems to have a story about their child being mistaken for the wrong gender, so who is doing all the mistaking? I think most of them are those without children but not always.

My brother was apparently always called a girl, no matter how much my mom dressed him in blue. But I think mistaking a girl in all pink and bows for a boy is ridiculous. Or at least like you said, don't specify! How hard is it to say "baby"??

Belly Charms said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

OMG - totally obvious the lady in the store was a capital B!!! Some people should not be allowed out of the house when they are adults either:) Have a great weekend and dress her in a blue dress with a blue bow and blue flip flops - LOL:) I have never seen a boy with a Bow...unless of course an older sister was responsible for it:)

Pam said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

That;s so funny. People always said stuff about my daughter being a boy (she was bald) and my son being a girl (he had hair.) Sheesh.
Oh course, one time I told someone, "What a cute baby!" and they jumped on me for not calling it a boy. Hello, bald, wearing yellow, not going to assume.
And btw, when I see you in the store, the first thing I will say is, "Are you done yet?" lol

Camilleta said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

Everyone always assumed my daughter was a boy if she wasn't absolutely decked out in girly, pink, frilly clothing. I guess because she has always had very short hair? And hahah, that lady sounds so dumb! It's funny because people who go around being judgmental usually just end up showing how ignorant they really are.

My Baby Sleep Guide said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

The craziest things, is that the lady got annoyed with you for correcting you on the gender and told you not to have your child wear a blue bow. What!? When people comment on how many kids you should or shouldn't have, that one really bugs me, more than most things.

I'm a new fb follower from ttt hop (via personal account so it counts). It would be great if you could stop by my page when you get the chance :) My Baby Sleep Guide


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